i couldn’t make this up even if i tried
what if i died in like twenty years and all i left my girlfriend was a box and like she gasps and reaches down to her chest where her key necklace hangs that i gave her twenty two years ago, and she uses it to unlock the box and all that is in there is a string which you can pull to reveal an embarrassing photo of spongebob at the christmas party
how much you wanna bet that was filler text that they completely forgot to replace with an actual caption
girls thoughts: look at that dog, look at that mirror, fuk im not small enough, why didnt my mum let me paint my fingernails hot pink when i was 6, is the sun sentient
guys thoughts: barbecue
Sure, kittens are cute and all..but what about the love and wisdom of old dogs?
I don’t think I could ever date a good actor like he could tell me he loves me and I’d be like nah you said it much more convincingly to kate winslet try again
tbh i think straight girls appreciate girls more than straight boys do
"Alright, this heist is titled Operation WAFFLE, which stands for ‘We’re All Friends, Friends Love Eachother’. Yesterday, uh, I learned that ‘each other’ is two words…"